"Worrying about tomorrow means that you are missing some of today" Corey Allan of Simple Marriage

Thursday, February 23, 2012

And I think it's all over

So before heading out to milk this arvo, at 3pm, I went to the loo, and bright red on the toilet paper.  Sad.  Told TJL and he was sad too.

I rang the nurse straight away and left a message.  She rang back and said that it didn't always mean it was over, but we may as well push the blood test out to Monday (to save me travelling to have it done on the Sunday).  I'm okay with that.

I felt pretty upbeat during milking - crazy ah!  We have another IVF in August, and then we have the frostie from this IVF, so it isn't all over completely.  So I had quite a few laughs with TJL while milking, while I planned the future in my head.

Got home, went to the loo, and nothing.  So hope built up again.

And then I got cramps, and there is more blood.  So even though it's not over until I get confirmation on Monday, I feel that this could be the end of IVF #1.  The fat lady isn't singing, but she is definitely warming up in the dressing room.  I will continue the pessaries (double ewwww!) until confirmation on Monday, as I have nothing to lose by doing it.

I am surprised at how matter of fact I feel about it.  But it is out of my control, and I can't do anything about it, so I'm just going with the flow (a bit too literally!) … hahaha

I trust God, He knows what He's doing, it is all in His hands.


Kim said...

I always thought that the progesterone was supposed to keep af from coming....

babycrazykiwi said...

I'm sorry its maybe not happening :( Will be thinking of you over the wkend my girl xx

(In)fertility Unexplained said...

Oh no! I was so hopeful that you were going to have a positive result from all this. I'm really really sorry; I KNOW how you feel. Sending hugs from far away.

Micha said...

Hi Kim - yes, I had heard that progesterone was supposed to keep af from coming. Doesn't appear to have worked this time, although it does appear to have made this 'period' (if that is what it is) a lot lighter.

Thanks guys! I'm feeling ok, it's just very 'confusing' to say the least … ah, such is life!