IVF journey begins, perhaps

Had my mid-cycle scan with Dr Fufu this afternoon.  Lucky I made it there in one piece as the weather was atrocious!  Wind and hardcore rain, twas a slow journey.

So I have two follicles that are a bit on the small side.  Might mature by Friday but Dr Fufu didn't sound very hopeful.  If I am not preggers this month, then she will refer us for IVF.  She has to refer us now as I am fast approaching 40, and we need to get onto the list before then, or we can't get our first cycle free.

Today, for the first time, she said my lining was not uniformly 'thick'.  Usually I am told that my lining is great.  She thought it was a bit 'bumpy' today, which could mean polyps which will have to be removed before IVF. Apparently these can prevent the implantation into the wall.

Another 'before we can get on the list' we have to have an HIV test each.  Now this makes me nervous, simply because, in my past life, I wasn't exactly well behaved, and while I really don't think I will test positive, I do still worry, because there is a remote chance I picked up something nasty way, way, way back in my early 20's.

I also have to have a BMI of less than 32.  She said that mine was currently 31, so just in.  I think I might be a bit heavier now so I actually think I am 33.  That said, the diet starts NOW.  Surely this will inspire me to lose weight.  If this doesn't nothing will.  I only have to lose, bah ha ha ONLY, yeah right, I have to lose around 5kg to get under the threshold, but I am SURE if I lose the weight, and more, it can only help our pregnancy chances.

If we do manage to get onto the waiting list it could be 12-18 MONTHS!  Really!! Not impressed!!!  However, should this be the case we can go private, which will cost $11,000.00, so that might end up being our best option ... TJL didn't say a heck of a lot when I mentioned it, but he takes a bit of time and 'thinks about it' whereas I give my initial reaction straight away.

So a bit of a disappointing appointment today, but onward and upward we go.  The only one who has any influence on our situation is the good Lord above, and I have to trust that He know's what He's doing and that it will be the right thing for us.  Patience, MJJ, Patience!